Il_Duce

Passing anecdotes and thoughts on politics, history, lit, sports or whatever...

Friday, March 10, 2006

Bikram Yoga

Well, my out of shape self took the plunge into physical fitness. This was a somewhat whimsical action, partially determined by peer pressure from 2 co-workers. I knew I was to find absolute misery; you can't really understand misery until you are there though. So I wandered down to the Tenderloin, Polk and Pine. Bikram Yoga is done in a preheated room of about 105-110 degrees. You feel like you just stepped into the jungles of Vietnam. You lay on the floor watching the ceiling fan, "Shit Saigon. I'm only in Saigon."

The workout lasts one and a half hours and features 26 repeated postures. Within three minutes you start to sweat. The smell is somewhere between sweat, dirty feet and cleanser. Attending a group exercise like this, certainly makes one a little self-conscious. Most of the people around you are in superb shape, contorting in ways you are convinced impossible. Within about 20 minutes, I had to sit as my head was spinning and waves of nausea were beginning to induce a direction I didn't want to go, vomiting in the room. So you sit there while everyone else continues to contort; you do feel a bit lame. Eventually the waves of nausea passed and I regained my position as yoga master. I do feel a big difference in my body after having done this. Surprisingly I am going to voluntarily go back for this sadistic treatment again.

13 Comments:

At 4:51 PM, Blogger LVSpike said...

Yoga, eh?

I always knew you had a bit of the old "soccer Mom" in ya. What's next? Jaunts to the cheese store in your SUV to pick up a slab of imported Belgian cheese to go with that vintage cabernet you stumbled across on your last sojourn to Napa? Or perhaps a venture into the mystical world of kabbalah?

Hmmm?

 
At 4:52 PM, Blogger Il_Duce said...

Ditty, You ever have a fucking lotus flower kick your ass?

 
At 4:34 PM, Blogger Logan Ryan Smith said...

you should try throwing up next time. all over.

all over everybody.

and everywhere.

all over.

 
At 4:18 PM, Blogger Il_Duce said...

I gave that shit up; should I really pay to feel like I am going to pass out and puke? Joined a gym, much more sane.

 
At 11:25 AM, Anonymous bethanylemony said...

man i was going to try yoga sometime (maybe after it went out of fashion)so im glad you wrote this.

 
At 2:34 PM, Blogger Il_Duce said...

Yeah Yoga is so early March. Done. Aren't you supposed to be in Europe or something?

 
At 2:34 PM, Blogger Il_Duce said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

 
At 11:19 AM, Blogger Logan Ryan Smith said...

got blog? where the more blog? how bout something on baseball? or howe about politics directly within these here states.

or how about puking.

how about a blog all about puking?

 
At 11:21 AM, Blogger Logan Ryan Smith said...

oh, and bethness, don't do yoga, please. just don't. i don't need you to go all hippy on me and start burning incense and wearing potouli and stuff.

 
At 10:09 AM, Blogger Il_Duce said...

Well Logan, some of us have to work at work :(

 
At 12:29 PM, Blogger Logan Ryan Smith said...

Oh, pa-leeeeeez!

 
At 11:02 AM, Blogger AEP said...

I LOVE Bikram. It's a really good substitute for all those other things that make you sweaty and spent if you are currently between partners.

The nausea passes, Duce, but the flexibility stays forever. Being able to do the splits in a standing position is really worth those first-timer's blackouts.

The only thing that sucks about Bikram is all the laundry you have to do.

 
At 12:12 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Great stuff you have here! I have a lucid dream site I think you might enjoy.

 

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